But It's Art!


So I thought I’d totally lost all interest in maintaining this site. I'd been as motivated to update this site as the Olsen Twins are motivated to eat actual food. To be fair, I’m at uni, working full time and have at least some sort of vague thing I’d like to call a ‘life’ so that left writing mocking columns about important events fairly low on the priority list. However, I hadn’t counted on two things… a renewed interest in trying to write this stuff… and a brainwave of a new approach.

Sure this thing hasn’t even been around 12 months so maybe reinventing it is a little drastic, but the reality is that writing 1500 word columns that are actually interesting to read on a regular basis plus doing all the design work is a little time consuming. However, I’ve decided to shake things up a bit.

Now, for starters some columns will not be very long at all. I’m going to attempt to emphasise quality over quantity here – although ‘quality’ as such is obviously not going to be easy to provide – it’s me writing here after all… However, I’m going to try and just write what comes to mind on various issues as they arise. For instance, this entry will be about the very topical artwork that’s just been banned. It may not be long, but it’ll be interesting… at least I hope it will.

Ok, if you’ve been living under a rock for the last few days and may not be aware, Australian artist Bill Henson took some ‘artistic’ photos of a naked 13 year old girl and is attempting to display them in art galleries. My opinion on it? Well, it’s quite clear – burn these freakin photos. Burn them!

Ok, I’m glad I got that off my chest. Most of you will know that I’m a centre-right political creature. I’m fairly accepting but am more conservative than I am liberal, but I think that this is an opinion that should be echoed across the political spectrum. Who the hell thinks that gazing at a naked 13 year old girl is good because it’s artistic?

Excuse me, but art is the most messed up thing going around. These days you can grab a toilet seat, put a plaque on it and thousands from around the wolrd will applaud your ‘art’ because it’s innovative. Go down to your local Bunnings and buy a bucket of paint, randomly chuck the paint at a canvas and somebody will pay you millions because you’re breaking barriers. Give me a break!

If I grabbed a 13 year old girl, made her strip naked and take some photos I would most likely be thrown in prison no questions asked or even worse, exiled to Tasmania. Think about it; if somebody found naked pictures of 13 year old girls on my computer, you’d think I was pretty messed up. But hold your horses… it’s art! What a total crock.

For as long as I can remember, artists (be they actors, musicians or actual painters) have long considered themselves to be morally superior to the rest of the world. They think they’re ‘ahead of their time’ and have these ideas of how the world works. Anyone who disagrees with them is simply being ‘oppressive’ or is ‘out of touch with reality’ or 'stuck living in the past'. No way.

The latest person to come out and endorse the images is none other than Kevin rudd's celebrity chum Cate Blanchett. She and numerous others wrote an official letter appealing for Kevin Rudd to back down on his opposition to the photos. I wonder if Cate would be happy if photos of her naked when she was 13 made it onto the Internet, or if photos of her daughter were displayed somewhere... would she be so happy about it?

The whole situation is absolutely stupid. If you’re reading this and disagree with me, then by all means, go photograph some naked schoolgirls for yourself. Just don’t blame me if you get arrested…

See, that wasn’t so hard. That took me a mere 7 minutes to write. Maybe there’s hope for this website after all.

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Olsen Twins
The Olsen Twins are seldom seen
in the presence of food.

Bill Henson enjoys the fact that 'art' can
justify almost anything these days

Cate Blanchett is a proponent
of Henson's photos